Let’s Spank Etrian Odyssey

Edit: I’ve uploaded new versions of the game with the bugs mentioned on the previous post (plus a few others that I found!) fixed. Also, I’ve discovered that the permissions on the Ubuntu executable downloaded from Mediafire are wonky, and I haven’t figured out a good way of fixing them (I love Ubuntu, but sometimes it really pisses me off). Basically, you can’t make the file executable by right-clicking on it, because you can’t get administrative privileges from the properties dialog, like you can in Windows. So in order to make Ubuntu recognize my game as an executable program, you need to open a command-line in the same directory as the executable and write:

~> sudo chmod +x PotionWars

Ubuntu will ask for your password (note that passwords do not appear when typed on the command-line. However, the computer is reading your keystrokes. Just type in your password and hit enter). Once you’ve provided your password, the program will be made executable.

So I recently went out and purchased a Nintendo DS and the first two Etrian Odyssey games (relatively modern old-school dungeon crawls, my favorite kind of RPG). Looking through the character classes I discovered that there is basically a dominatrix class called Dark Hunters:

Dark Hunters were the mistresses of sword and lash
Their binding skills could sway the tide of any clash
Their blades carried affliction with every slash
The monsters they faced reduced to cinders and ash

Complete with a dominatrixy outfit.

This got me thinking that it’d be kind of fun to do a Spanko Let’s Play (well more of a sequence of short stories inspired by the events in the game), with a group of adventurers led by a Dark Huntress who believes firmly in corporal punishment for wayward party members.

The way I currently envision it, it would be an F/F adventure with an all female party (because that’s my favorite pairing), with the Dark Huntress as a mostly top, and the other party members switches/bottoms (the Dark Huntress wouldn’t take kindly to others administering discipline without her approval).

I’d shoot for a bi-monthly update cycle (though a lot of that depends on how much time I get to play the game, and how much material each play session gives me).

I also want to try my hand at a more zany, over-the-top style as opposed to the more angsty tone of Potion Wars.

However, my primary focus will still be on Potion Wars, and if I need to cut back on spanko projects, this will be the one to go.

I’m looking for party member suggestions (I can have five characters in a party, so I’m looking for an additional four, all characters must be 18+). Suggestions would be much appreciated. Here are the other eight classes pulled directly from the manual:

The Landsnknecht had a sword that could cut you in twain
[Her] powerful might was known as the monster’s bane
With sword or axe, [she] caused the foul demons much pain
From the front line [she] lost count of the monsters slain

Survivalists were [mistresses] of the woodland lore
You’d mark them by the hats and the scarves that they wore
Their specialty was the firing the arrows that soared
The Labryinth explorers sought them for their corps

Protectors bore a shield in their holy quest
Under its aegis did her companions rest
This noble knight was up to the hardest of tests
No enemy could tarnish that virtuous crest

The Medics healed their wounded comrades in need
The poison stings and the injuries that bleed
At great expense did they perform their kind deeds
Their frailty prevented them taking the lead

The learned ones with magic were the Alchemists
The elements they controlled by flicking their wrists
Their magic made up the weakness of their fists
Without one in the party their presence was missed

Now Troubadours, my own kind, brought cheer and gave mirth
Both menfolk and ladies were the salt of the earth
Our songs boosted the party and proved our own worth
In returning the Labyrinth’s beasts to the earth

From foreign lands the mysterious Ronin hail
Their skill with swords came also from that unknown vale
They’ll fight down to the last [woman] with tooth and with nail
And flay the beasts’ hide empty of stinger and scale

The rarely spotted Hexer controls with a word
The curses [she] let fly with are the last things heard
By [her] command, monsters to suicide are spurred
When recruiting, placement on the back line’s preferred

To start things off, here’s the team leader:

Name: Allison Kat Andrea
Profession: Dark Huntress
Position: Mostly top
Age: 27
Bio: A rathy bossy gal, whose parents couldn’t decide between “Allison,” “Kat,” and “Andrea” so they picked All of the Above. Goes by Andrea because Allison and Kat are names for simpering, perpetually distressed damsels who’re probably sissy medics to boot. Andrea is not a simpering, perpetually distressed damsel whose probably a sissy medic to boot, and any suggestions otherwise is a shortcut to a smarting bottom. She is laser focused on exploring the Labryinth, and doesn’t have the time or patience for silly things like “fun,” “friendship,” or “stress relief.” No one knows [I]why[/I] she’s so obsessed with the Labryinth, and asking her only leads to a brusque “That’s my business.” She thinks having mysterious motives makes her a deep, three-dimensional heroine. They do not.

Her mother had this to say: “Eh, she’s probably just looking for an excuse to get out of the house. Thank goodness, too. I love my little Aly, but she’s incapable of doing the simplest of chores without a bottom warming first. All she wants to do is play with her whips. Which is silly, by the way. Proper young ladies become medics.”

You can make your suggestion less or more detailed as you prefer. If I can get enough suggestions to form a full party, I’ll consider interest high enough to justify doing the Let’s Spank.

Note: This will not impact Potion Wars. I’ll be playing/writing for Etrian Odyssey during time that I wouldn’t normally spend on Potion Wars anyway.

2 thoughts on “Let’s Spank Etrian Odyssey

  1. I think it’d be funny to have a “sissy medic” in Andrea’s party, so here’s my suggestion.

    Name: Allison Greenweaver
    Profession: Medic
    Position: Mostly Bottom
    Age: 21
    Bio: Allison comes from a long line of first rate Medics and there was no way her parents were going to let her break that line. So whether she wanted to or not, Allison became a Medic. She does love helping people and people are more open to her help when injured in some way. But she does tend to resent her not having a choice as to which profession she’d go into, which can make her a bit moody and defiant at times. But she can also be stern and unforgiving when dealing with her patients, she’s not above prescribing a sore bottom for a patient who’s being difficult.

    1. Thanks so much! Glad to see at least one person is interested enough to post a character suggestion. And even better, this character is giving me some nice ideas. Oh yes, does this character gives me ideas. Hopefully, others will post a few character suggestions as well, and we can get this thing rolling.

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